I am very close to at my wit's end. My youngest son just turned 15 a couple weeks ago. Things have been snowballing over a long period of time. I have tried everything that I know to help him transition through this tough spot. Nothing is working.The thing that has gotten me to such a level of frustration that I just feel like crying is that he absolutely refuses to talk to me about anything no matter how much I might try, or how I might try. The situation isn't as such that I have been nagging, hollering, and pushing. I have been treating him as an essential cog in the machine. I have shared my concerns, my needs, and my desires. I have asked in several different ways for him to do the same. Everything falls on deaf ears. It's to the point of disrespect.
I feel so helpless. While hubby and I were gone for the weekend I left a completely doable list of academic type things for him. I went over everything to make sure he didn't have any questions, so he knew exactly what I was asking for. He blatantly did nothing; not one single thing. When I asked about it last night he told me he forgot. Bull dookey! We talked on the phone at least three times while we were gone. I know he didn't forget. He didn't even take proper care of the animals. There was one thing that I asked him that was most important to me, so I asked again for him to do it last night. He didn't. So, again this afternoon (it took me two hours to get him out of bed even though I didn't start until 11AM) I asked him again to do it. He did, but only halfheartedly.
Soooooo.....I tried sharing my concerns with him again. I let him know that it was my desire to treat him like a young adult, not a five-year-old. Unfortunately, I feel like he is giving me no choice. Maybe that is what he wants. Maybe he wants me to just tell him what to do and play the role of the enforcer. That is so frustrating to me! I just want to help lead the way, not play babysitter all day long.
From talking to several fellow homeschooling moms I know that this is not uncommon. I know that it is indicitive of the age. However, it does not change our reality and my need to find some kind of happy medium here. I so DO NOT want to be the "commie mom". I hate that role with a passion.
Has anyone else out there been through this? What have you done? Bear in mind that I am not a rigid, schedule laden, kind of homeschool mom. We have been relaxed and child-led for many years. What we were doing this year was per his request. However, he seems to be chucking everything out the window and closing himself off. I know timelines are artificial and all that jazz. I just cannot allow things to continue in this fashion any longer. We are talking months people. It is past painful.
