Trying to Focus

To be honest I haven't gotten it together much since my last post.  I just put in one of my co-op orders.  It included a one pound bag of hot cocoa.  So, there's still hope.  Seems I'm anticipating this coming winter like I used to look forward to summer.  I am not alone in my longing this year.  Bella has been asking when it will snow again ever since spring began.  A girl after my own heart!

I have some changes in mind that have little to do with our homeschool and more to do with the sanity that comes along with a life more savored than rushed through.  This mindset is bound to effect our approach to education, but for now the planning of our academics remains the same.

We live about 20 minutes from everywhere.  In this diligent planning of excursions is of high importance so as to not waste time or money.  Years ago when it was just us and the first seven children in The Crew I did my grocery shopping once per month.  It's been on my mind to switch to that again.  The funny thing is that I kept that shopping format when we lived in the city where good shopping and frequent sales were plentiful.  It was just nice to knock it out once a month and not have to think about shopping for a few weeks rather than heading out every Sunday, the worst day to shop, gathering up our supplies for the week.  Also, we had a nice produce market within walking distance.  It made replacing perishables on an as needed basis very easy.  This time around we do not have such a convenience.  Where we are now, convenience costs more than I'm willing to pay most times, and it doesn't include anything fresh.  So, I've been giving this some thought.  Maybe once every three weeks would be more realistic.  I'll really have to figure this out soon since I want to get this started next month.

There are SO MANY benefits of shopping monthly as opposed to weekly, or even bi-weekly.  The biggest for me is the savings.  It also teaches you patience and learning to "make do"; the real essence of truly being thrifty.  We can be much more productive around the homestead when the bulk of our time is spent here.  There's time for games, spontaneous creativity, movie nights, baking together, and on and on.  Ultimately, I hope to use my time in the effort of food preservation, cooking ahead, pursuing my writing course, and working more on my love for photography.  Not to mention the natural health course I purchased nearly two years, yes that's YEARS, ago and never even opened yet.

We'll be learning how to over winter animals for the first time this year.  This is our first time ever, like in our whole lives, raising livestock.  We have chickens and sheep now.  Our oldest female is expecting sometime next month, and we're anxiously awaiting the new experiences a new lamb will bring to the homestead.  With the winters we've had these past two years I am a bit anxious about what caring for these critters will entail.  That's a huge change, going out side every.single.day no matter the weather.  Negative 30 can be really brutal.  Keeping them fed, watered, and sheltered will be a chore, I'm sure.  We are, however, enjoying the dynamic they being to our lives despite the work they require.  There is something to be said about raising your own food.

That brings me to the next thing I hope to achieve this winter.  Garden plans!  I managed to grow a little bit of food this year.  I did get 50+ bags of zucchini shredded up and put in the freezer, and we enjoyed the fresh cucumbers.  However, the chickens have managed to destroy the last of my cukes and are working at my tomato plants.  Jerks!  It's my fault.  I know.  All summer they left my small garden alone.  It's the old flower beds around our front porch.  That is, until I picked four zucchini and forgot to bring them in.  Seeing them laying there was just too much temptation for them to resist, apparently.  Ever since then I have been shooing them off the front porch and out of my vegetables.  UGH!

Next year we plan to have at least a few raised beds built with a fence erected around them to protect our food from the vultures, er uh chickens.  I've been drooling my way through my seed catalog and dreaming of the different things I'd like to grow next year.  I'm hoping my mom with partner with me in this project.  God blessed her with two green thumbs, and a couple of toes I think.  She plans to retire after her birthday in March.  Would be SO AWESOME to have her around more.  There are many, many things we can learn from her.  She's a work horse and would not be thwarted as easily as I when it comes to canning pickles on the hottest day of summer or braving the mosquitoes and humidity to harvest the bumper berry crop in the woods.  She has a way of keeping me moving forward.

Come to think of it, too bad she can't come over and get me motivated.  There are so many things eating at me right now.  I have not finished our school plan for this year, and we are slated to start in just a week and a half.  Then there's the housework.  I really wanted to do some deep cleaning.  My windows look like they've never been cleaned, and there are cobwebs giving birth to more cobwebs in the corners.  Oh, and the books!  I did make a lot of progress with my collection, but there is still more to be done.  How I dream of a fully cataloged library.  Key word dream!

So...

How am I dealing with this jumbled up conglomeration of dreams, wants, and needs that keep tripping me up on my course to a peaceful and prepared start to our new school year?  Sometimes it feels like I'm not, but I know that isn't true.

I've been giving myself A LOT of grace.  We are often times more hard on ourselves than anyone else, so it is appropriate to be the first in line to cut ourselves some slack.  We shouldn't expect perfection from ourselves anymore than anyone else should.  So, why do we do that?  I am actively trying to quit using the word lazy in reference to myself.  I am not lazy.  Repeat.  I am not lazy!  I am tired, overwhelmed, pressured, and a lot of other things, but I know that I am not lazy.  That negative self talk needs to hit the highway.

I make my morning studies a priority.  I have a collection of small books and bible studies that I like to start my day out with.  It helps a great deal to put my mind in the right place before I begin my day.  When my mind is more on Christ and less on my struggles it helps my feet to be firmly planted facing the direction they should be when I step out to face what lies before me each day.  Being grounded means something totally different to me as an adult.  It's a good thing.

I lean on a friend...or two.  Good friends are a real blessing, and I am thankful to count for myself a few.  It's so nice to have at least one person that will tell you like it is; set you straight when your thinking gets skewed.  Sometimes we just need to vent, or we need to run something past someone before we can more forward, especially when it comes to the challenges of life.  I'm willing to bet that most everyone faces difficulties and trials that they never could have imagined they would in their entire life.  Having at least one good friend that you can trust to protect your heart and guard your soul is more valuable than any earthly possession we could have.  Don't be afraid to learn on someone when times are challenging.

I enlist professional, or not so professional, help.  Maybe someone comes and watches the kids so I can take a day to myself.  Maybe I seek the advice of a therapist.  Maybe I get a massage.  Maybe I hire someone to clean my home a time or two.  Maybe I hire a local teen to do garden work or help me organize.  This falls in the realm of grace as well.  Sometimes we don't want to spend our time or resources on someone's help.  Sometimes we feel we don't have time to take off to take care of ourselves.  Let me remind you of the airplane and the oxygen mask.  Enough said.

I throw out the routine and change the plans.  Well, not every day, but here and there when we need to.  Sometimes the time is just right, and I allow myself to go with the flow.  Those are the best days!  No stressing over what wasn't done.  No worrying about falling behind.  Behind what?  Exactly!  No worries, period.  Just go with it.  Those are the times that make memories and rejuvenate the soul.

Now, I am going to go finish preparing dinner.  I am not going to worry or stress over the things weighing on my shoulders.  I am going to be present in the moment, do what I can, and take life moment by moment.  I will do what I can as I am able.

No worries.

Focus on What Matters

Anyone that has poked around The Zoo Crew, even the slightest little bit, surely has discovered that we are living a life a little less ordinary.  Life has a way of catching us off guard, turning us on our heels, and sending us in a whole different and unexpected direction.  I am not saying this is bad, per say.  It does however pose some challenges.  As the years have gone by we have learned more and more how to respond more effectively and transition more quickly to our new found place in life.

I have learned to pray more; more often, more fervently, and more specifically.  Life is SO MUCH easier when I start my day with prayer and bible study.  It is AMAZING the difference this one act can make on the quality of my day.  Beginning in prayer sets the tone for the day, and it centers my focus.  I am more conscious of my purpose and much more aware of what is truly important.

Listen to my words, Lord, consider my lament
Hear my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you I pray. 

In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice;
in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. 

─ Psalms 5:1-3

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, 

by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, 

will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  

─ Phillipians 4:6-7

Our newest transition involves two beautiful girls and a headfirst dive back into active homeschooling.  We have learned some things along the way, and we are working on making a safe and stable home for the entire family.  This means some trial and error has taken place, and we have had to learn a new way of living.  One thing that we do is to begin and end our day with biblical focus.  The kids love it, and it brings us together as a family.  So, not only am I beginning my day in the bible, but the children are as well.

Currently, we are reading the book of Luke.  We have traveled our way through the Old Testament over the last year, learning lessons through our previous curriculum. We loved it and look forward to more in depth study in the future.  Now, we are beginning the day with me reading an entire book from the bible.  Then Harmony reads aloud a complementary bit from another source reinforcing what we just read and helping her to grasp the scripture more fully.  All of the kids enjoy this part of our day, and it sets a nice tone.

I share this with you to demonstrate that we are focusing on what is important and cutting a lot of slack in other areas.  The biggest lesson that I have learned is that there are seasons in all of our lives, and the areas of most importance change with those seasons.  Through it all our foundation, our relationship with Christ, holds the highest importance.  It matters not if we travel the valley, climb the hills, or rest on a plateau.  Our connection with Christ is our life force.  It is our purpose; our guiding light.

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: 

but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

- Ephesians 6:4

For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, 

but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.

- Mark 10:45

For our family it has become essential to get back to the basics, find our center, and focus on the core.  Your basics, your center, and your core are very likely different than ours.  What it means for us now, during this season of our lives, is to slow down and focus on the basics.  We are learning to lean on Christ, respect ourselves and others, and to live life with an others focus instead of a self focus.  It is more challenging than you might think.

What does this mean for our family?

Aside from putting Christ first in our daily lives, each day we keep the same "schedule".  This means we try to have the same flow throughout each day.  The exact time on the clock may not be the same, but the order in which we do things is consistent.  This fosters a sense of security and stability for the kids, and it is remarkable the effect it has on their behavior.  This becomes completely evident when we stray from it too long!

You see?  I am really not a schedule person.  I am a total unschooler at heart, and I LOVE freedom!  However, the most important thing in the happiness, well being, and educating of my children is by far for me to maintain a consistent schedule.  This means 24/7, even on Sabbath!  UGH!  I do it kicking and screaming all the way, but each time I get too "relaxed" with my approach I am quickly reminded of the error of my ways.  So, we keep a schedule of sorts, and the kids thrive in knowing what to expect next.  

He becometh poor that dealeth with a slack hand, 

but the hand of the diligent maketh rich.

- Proverbs 10:4

In regard to "academics" I have also discovered that there is a season for things of a school nature as well.  We follow a basic outline, but it changes greatly based on our current circumstances, the needs and desires of our children, and even the weather.  Yes, the weather!  Life is seasonal, and learning is life.  So, it makes perfect sense that what we learn flows with the seasons.  I am excited for spring this year for possibly the first time ever.  We are on land now, and we have young children, and this winter was C-O-L-D.  We have projects waiting to be done, and we have children desperate to be outside.  This year will be my first year purchasing rain coats.  We will be outside rain or shine, as long as it is warm enough, all spring, summer, and fall for the first time ever in my life.  The land will not wait for us.  It will do its thing whether or not we are outside and active, so if we want to achieve the plans we have we need to work diligently.

In academics, now is a time for us to explore writing, reading, and math with excitement and interest, not drudgery.  I strive to create an environment rich with opportunity for learning in order to foster natural curiosity and interest.  So far, so good.  The difference is that we are fitting these core subjects in AROUND the things that foster character and family bonding.  Things like cooking, household responsibilities, playing games and doing puzzles, free play, writing to friends and family, doing kind deeds, and being helpful.

Trust me.  There was a time when I could not have approached life in this manner.  I was too busy washing the dishes and folding laundry to focus on the character building opportunity before me with my children.  Our unique circumstances have fostered a new desire for this batch of children currently in my charge.  I am more concerned about their heart, their soul, and their spirit.  I recognize that all those other things, the academics, will come in their own time, naturally.  They need not be forced, and it is all learning, all connected, and all important.  Sometimes we just need to adjust our focus.