Planning to be Flexible in My Homeschool

It's funny how time presses on, and we transform into a new reflection of ourselves.  It's true, really.  I mean, think about it.  Are you the same person you were even a year ago?  What about 10 or 20 years ago?  Of course not!  One of the areas I notice the greatest change in myself over the years, and the most painful of processes I might add, is in the area of flexibility.  I am still a very serious person, but praise God I can relax a little now.  There are so many factors that have contributed to me learning to loosen up a little bit, and not take life quite so seriously.

My life has been anything but simple.  Maybe that is why I have become so determined to live more and more simple as each day passes.  I actually work to slowdown; to take in the beauty around me, and to genuinely enjoy living.  This does not come without it's challenges.  One expression rings true for me more often than I like, "Life gets in the way of living."  It seems I am in a constant battle against the throws of life, but I am becoming an expert at rolling with the punches.

Most recently life has been quite possibly more challenging for me than it ever has been, and that is saying a lot given all the challenges I have faced in my 40 plus years.  As a homeschool parent in our unique circumstances I am quite certain it has never been more important to me to keep a regular schedule and stay on track.  This is a feat that proved near impossible of late.  Rest assured we have entered a 'life lull', and I couldn't be more relieved.

The key to flexibility?  Planning.  Yes, that's right.  Planning.  It is my planning that permits me the freedom to be flexible.  Only certain things get written in pen, because ALL things can be rescheduled, restructured, revised, and rewritten.  Having a plan helps me keep my head about me when all of life is spinning out of control around me.  What plans are the biggest stress reducers in times of extreme chaos?  Here are the top on my list:

Educational Plan - I always plan at a minimum one week out.  Ideally, I will plan a month ahead.  Of course, this is written COMPLETELY in pencil.  The freedom it gives me is unmatched by anything else.  It is so much easier to pull out my planner, look at the plan for the day, and work my way down the list.  No real thinking is needed; just read and do!  It may be a bit intimidating at first, but the return on the investment is priceless.  Having it all written ahead of time makes it so much easier to shuffle things around if need be, and most importantly accomplish more than we would if we were completely flying by the seat of our pants.  My new favorite tool for keeping this all together is My Well Planned Day planner.  I use the paper version.  It rocks!

Meal Plan - Having a meal plan is a close second to the educational plan.  I can quite lose my mind if I have had a stressful, or unexpectedly busy day, and I find myself with three hungry kids and no plan.  It's in times like this that I resort to poor decision making.  I let laziness, or tiredness, or stress, or whatever you prefer to label it, win out and order a pizza, or pick up Chinese, or even go out to eat.  Living 20 minutes away from everything makes this an even more costly venture.  My time and money, and my health, are very important to me.  So, if I want to protect those areas of my life and the lives of my family I must have a plan.  Over the years I have used different strategies to accomplish the same goal.  One resource you may enjoy is called Pepperplate.  I loved it for a time, and will surely return to it one day, but for now I am a pen to paper meal planner.  Quite simply, I just make a list of breakfasts, lunches, and dinners for about three weeks.  I base my grocery shopping on those meals, which is done every two weeks, and plug my meals in my planner (in pencil).  I don't always have the said meal on the said day, but I can be prepared for busy days and plan to cook more involved meals on more relaxed days.

Self-Care Plan - With the education of my children planned out and the food we'll eat prepared for, it's time for me to think about what it is that keeps me sane.  What do I do to feed my soul, to tend to the care and keeping of me?  As mothers we give 100% of ourselves, and that will surely run short if we don't keep ourselves in good health; spiritual, mental, and physical.  I may not be able to pursue all the things that interest me all the time, but I can keep my eye out for opportunities, and even create them as the need, or dare I say desire, arises.  One book that really helped me along in recognizing was The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron.  I worked through it years ago with a friend.  I am glad I stuck it out.  It did require some commitment.  I've always thought to do it again, but the time has not come for such things as of yet.  Also, I currently use YouVersion to do my morning studies.  It's awesome, because you can do studies and easily catch up if you miss a day or two, or more.  Meal planning falls under this category as well since planning ahead allows me the freedom to prepare homemade, fresh food for myself and my family.  I also make an effort to surround myself with uplifting individuals and consciously invest my time in quality people.  All relationships take a certain amount of work.  Choose where you spend your energy wisely, and you will be greatly blessed by your efforts.

Financial Plan - I do not claim to be any sort of expert in the area of finances, but the responsibility for my household finances has landed in my lap.  I have learned by experience what works for me and what does not.  I simply must keep a monthly budget and maintain the importance of tithe at the very top of my list.  I am not sure what your experience has been, but I can tell directly in my pocketbook if I have fumbled the ball in the tithe department.  It has been my experience that my finances are MUCH easier to bear when I faithfully pay my tithe.  Bill paying and budgeting other expenses is most challenging, by far, when I somehow fail to remember to pay my tithe.  In general money goes much farther if you have a plan, and don't just throw it around thoughtlessly.  In times of great stress, it is SO MUCH easier to just pop on my computer, look at my list of commitments, and pay the bills.  No real thinking is needed.  It is a total life saver.  If you have not taken advantage of online bill pay, you simply have to give it a try.  It saves loads of time and money.  Love it!

Special Occasion Plan - With so many children in my charge there is no way we can have any type of gathering without at least some advance planning on my part.  Over the years I have gotten better and better at simplifying things, praise God!  Having raised seven children to adulthood, four public schooled/three homeschooled, and currently raising three more as homeschoolers, along with waiting for grandchild number 13 to enter the world, just getting our immediate family together is a major undertaking.  Some events get planned months in advance, while others can be put together in a couple of weeks, or even days when necessary, but the common thread is to plan.  Period.  Also, I have learned to not be shy about asking for help when I need it.  The perfectionist-control freak in me has learned to allow such "intrusions".  ;)

Homestead Plan - This kind of ties in with my homeschool plan, as our plan is to raise our children to know and understand the homestead lifestyle.  It has become very important to me to live as close to the land as possible.  It is a purpose that I value in importance for teaching my children.  The land we tend, the food we eat, being responsible and accountable, our contribution to our community; all of these things are of great importance to me.  Homesteading fits perfectly into our lifestyle and offers many lessons on planning and flexibility.  On a homestead there would not be much accomplished if we were lacking much in either area.

Housekeeping Plan - There was a time in my life when this would be at the top of my list, and look where it landed.  At the very bottom!  Of course, it is necessary to plan for the care and keeping of your home, but I dare say that it is the easiest to slough off and the most forgiving.  All the things listed above, yes all of them, are incredibly more important than how much laundry you have, or the counter full of dishes, or even how many weeks, or months, it's been since you mopped your floors.  It took me years AND YEARS to become comfortable with this fact, but it is entirely life changing once you arrive; I mean completely arrive.  Of course, if you ever want to achieve a certain level of clean, or even maintain a semblance of cleanliness, it is purely essential to have a plan.  Even a loose plan is helpful.  Your truest of friends don't come over to inspect your house, they come to see you.  Learn to relax a little and recognize that everyone that has any amount of children home full-time lives in various stages of mess and disorder.

So, the conclusion?  Planning the various parts of my life integral to my daily living gives me the freedom to be flexible.  I have learned to value my time above all other resources.  Whatever I can do to guard and protect my most cherished resource is well worth my effort and pays off in great dividends, most of all the preservation of my sanity.

Old Tanenbaum

Christmas just isn't Christmas without a real Christmas tree. This statement comes from my husband. In the 13 years of our relationship this has always been a strong point of disagreement. I now find myself really struggling to honor his real tree Christmas fantasy fulfillment for yet another Smith Family Christmas. I have been pondering this point all evening, and I am still in conflict.

This year is exceptionally challenging in the "having enough time" department. Apparently my Wonder Woman Cape has mysteriously been donated to charity, because it is nowhere to be found. I spent the first part of November sick with a bad cold for about 11 days and recovered just in time to pull off Thanksgiving. Then, this past Tuesday I suddenly came down with a very bad cold/flu type thing that I actually suspected to be H1N1. I stuck with my natural remedies and chiropractic care and accepted the five day grounding to my room. Needless to say between these two illnesses I have fallen completely off course in regard to preparing for Avery and preparing for Christmas, and both are right around the corner. Quite literally.

With so much to do that now includes catching up on my normal household duties, the November and October month-end bookkeeping for the shop, updating the bills, locating a counselor to assist us through our family adoption process, securing all the documents and paperwork for the adoption, preparing our house for the home visits related to the adoption, and all of my holiday baking, gift making, shopping, and wrapping seriously just how important is a real tree? The actual pivotal point for me was when I found out hubby is going to go hunting one more time after telling me that he would be home next weekend. See, this means that I get to do it all by myself AGAIN. Somehow, gathering the tree, setting it up, caring for it, cleaning up after it, decorating it, undecorating it, taking it down, and disposing of it are all my responsibility. Hubby NEVER helps aside from actually putting it into the stand...sometimes. The rest of that list is all me with the occasional child helper; which is getting less and less the older they get.

Finally, I had visions of a family day together decorating the home and putting up the tree coming to fruition this coming Sabbath. What a beautiful way to spend the day, right? I could live with the beast of a chore making tree if it was a fun family day. However, my vision disappeared like a movie tape in the heads of an old, dirty VHS player when hubby let me know that he was going to go hunting again one day next weekend. Of course, he has no idea which day. This man knows nothing of planning. Can you say, "AHHHH!"

My defiant, independent self wants to just chuck everything and not have a tree. Well, I know the revolt that would come from that one, so the next best thing in my book is a good old-fashioned fake tree. My ideal? A 4-foot tree on an end table covered by a pretty, white sheet in front of the window. Totally works for me. Easy up. Easy down. No muss. No fuss.

Any opinions?

Phase One Complete

With baby planning, Thanksgiving hosted at my home, and Christmas on the horizon it has been difficult for me to focus my thoughts long enough to even consider writing a new post. To my regular visitors, please accept my apologies. I know it has been pretty boring here with no new content. So much for my old rule of at least one new blog entry per week. My brain is just on overdrive, and if it were not for lists I would never accomplish a thing.

Seeking out cute baby clothes has been quite a pleasure. Who remembers new babies are so tiny? Have you looked at a newborn baby diaper lately? Are their butts really that small? I had to put a stop to my clothes shopping; at least for a while anyway. About the only thing this child needs in the fabric department is some more Onsies and those cute little mittens that stop their little nails from scratching their cute little faces. Other than that, I have the newborn department filled. Time to focus on other things like bottles, nipples, diapers and accessories, blankets, sheets, a monitor, and the million other things I'm not thinking of right now.

Over the years I have grown to know and love certain resale stores in the area. That is one good thing about living in such an urban setting, there are plenty to choose from. Imagine my surprise when I found the cutest little boutique style resale shop, Secret Treasures Upscale Resale, right in the neighborhood. I have managed to find over 95% of the things I have purchased so far all under this one cool, little roof. The quality of their goods is amazing, and you don't have to pick through armloads of items to find something good. It's all good. You just spend your time deciding what is cutest in your size and price range. Love it! This past Friday I found an adorable, like new bassinet for $40; a steal in my book based on the prices of the new ones. I spent the weekend rearranging our bedroom and redecorating the walls. It looks great, and I find myself staring at the bassinet hardly believing that in less than two months there will be this cute little miracle in there completely depending on me for everything.

How is it that babies can be so cute, lovable, and awe inspiring while at the same time completely terrifying? Of course, I don't mean that literally, but there are moments when I do feel a little intimidated. There is solace in knowing that my feelings are all completely normal. It is also interesting to note that this is the most relaxed I have ever been anticipating the arrival of a baby. Maybe it's the fact that I don't have to give birth. (Heaving a BIG sigh of relief!) Barring some unforeseen miracle of God, which we all know he is capable of but hope he's not planning on demonstrating, experiencing the miracle of birth is something permanently checked off of my list of things to experience in my lifetime. AMEN!

As the arrival of our beloved Avery gets closer and closer it is becoming more evident to my husband as well as myself just how different life will be with a newborn around 24/7 and completely dependent upon us for his nurturing. Pat, my husband, and Andrew, our oldest son, went to our friends' home in Big Rapids to do some hunting. When he came home he told me all about this idea he had for us this summer. Our friends would come to our home, and we would ride the motorcycles up the coast of The Thumb to those great cabins we stayed in two years ago for our anniversary. I thought it was a great idea, but I wondered how much fun it would be on the back of the motorcycle with Avery in a sling. Of course, this got a few chuckles out of both of us. The fact that we would then be new parents had completely slipped his mind. So, the original plan switched from riding up together to me driving the car with our new bundle of joy while they rode the motorcycles so that motorcycle riding would still be a fun option for the excursion. A win, win situation for all of us.

It's strange to think this time next year we will be preparing to celebrate our first Christmas with Avery. Who would have thought we would ever have that experience together? I was most certain that big landmark firsts were a thing of the past. This just goes to show that one really does never know what lies around tomorrow's corner. Life is full of wonderful experiences and opportunities when one is a willing participant in the plans of God.

Good News Today

Today was the day. We had to be in for her ultrasound at 10:30 this morning. The purpose? Determine whether or not the placenta has moved out of the way of the birth canal. The previous ultrasound showed that the placenta was blocking the cervix putting both our daughter and the baby in grave danger. Praise God! The placenta has moved off to the side, so there is no more danger to either of them, and we can plan for a natural birth.

The next doctor's visit will be next Tuesday. At this visit we will discuss a birth plan. This is something that is going to require some thought, prayer, and sensitivity. It is our daughter's desire for us to take Avery immediately upon birth. Up until this point we really haven't given the birth plan too much thought or conversation, because we did not know what her delivery might entail. Of course it would be a completely different situation had we needed to go the way of a planned C-Section. Now, it looks as though things will progress normally, so we need to determine what that means for us as a family.

This is such a unique opportunity and something we never could have foreseen. There is so much to do and such little time to do it. I have been painstakingly considerate of our daughter's feelings. This means that I have not done a whole lot of preparing for the baby. She asked to not be a part of the shopping, planning, or any other aspect of the preparations. Due to the fact that she will be living in our home for another six weeks or so, I have been trying to wait to do too much in the baby department. I have purchased some clothing and things for the baby's bedroom walls, but that's about the extent of things. It's just weird to me. Anyone that knows me would see how this is just so against my nature. I am a perfectionist planner type.

I have found myself sick with a cold for the past week, and that has really slowed me down. So, last weekend I made a list of everything we will need for Avery. Wow! Who remembered that babies required so many things. Even if one takes a conservative approach to the whole development, the list is still long. It seems January will find me consumed in everything baby.