Writing something new and interesting here has been on my mind, oh since my last post. I'm sure you are familiar with those times that life just kind of sucks you in, and there really isn't anything you can do about it. You just need to go with the flow. Well, I'm coming out of one of those times.
In mid-July we got some life changing news that I am not a liberty to discuss fully as of yet. After some decisions are made, then I will share the full story here. It is my hope that at least one will benefit from our experience. Be that as it may, this news just sent me into a tail spin. It blindsided me so to speak. Fortunately we had a little bit of a heads up, so we were able to process things a bit before we had to face the situation head on.
Currently, we are still facing the situation head on, but the process paralyzed me for a time. It was rather unexpected. I think I was in shock, then it was a deep depression. Fortunately, I have grown a bit over the years, and this did not freak me out as it would have years ago. Before I understood how we function I used to get terribly frightened when I would get depressed. I would fear I was going crazy, literally. I would fear I was always going to feel that way and never be able to snap out of it.
After some experience, and a bit of education, I can see depression for what it is. It really can be therapeutic in and of itself. Sometimes we just need to go through it to have clarity on the other side. Depression is not necessarily a bad thing. It can be positive and beneficial if we embrace the process. Looking back I can see a few stages that I went through. Initially it was shock, then I was depressed and didn't realize it. Next, I became aware of the fact that I was depressed and just kind of went with it. I allowed myself to process, and it was the best thing I could have done. I talked with God a lot. Then, I started to come around. Things became more clear. After intense seeking I reached out for help. Now, I am able to see things more clearly, and it is a wonderful feeling. God never disappoints. He will guide us if we desire and request his guidance. It's a beautiful thing.
Sometimes God even surprises us. Have you ever found yourself thinking, "Really, God? You want me to do what? Right now? After all this? Really?" That is where we are right now. I'm sorry I cannot say a whole lot more. Decisions still need to be made before I can move too much more forward in this area, but we are in process. It is a beautiful place to be. It took us a while to get it together enough to be in process. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Have you been there, done that? Are you there right now?
Know that God has written His Word on your heart, and he is always guiding us. Seek Him and He will lead. He will hold you up in the good times and the bad. He is always there. God never fails us. AMEN!
2 comments:
I can so relate. My DH suffers from depression, looks to God for answers and pulls through every time! It's always a pile up when it happens and my support is constantly required. The process is, well sometimes overwhelming. God walks me through it. He puts the words and actions in my head upon request when I'm at a loss, you know. Blessings to you and yours!
Depression can be a tricky thing. It sounds like you and your hubby have figured out how to work through it. Praise God!
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